All of have these moments in life, where we are scared. We don’t know what is right and what is wrong. We don’t know whether to lose hope just because everyone else has. We are incapable of deciding. But those are moments that are worth living for. If you hold yourself uptight and gather courage to remain confident, that’s what makes you a true hero. Everyone one of us has had this time in life, where we don’t regret speaking and believing in yourself even when others didn’t. One such moment for me was my first MUN.

I froze to my chair hearing the word, Qatar. It struck me hard as the freezing wind and a sudden chill crept up my spine. Public speaking had always been my cup of tea. But on the 12th September 2015, as I was seated in the auditorium, I felt as if the dark queen had drenched all my powers away. My feeble body needed support to stay upright. As I reached out to the bottle of water, I heard the sound louder and clearer… The Delegate of Qatar.

With a mouth, refusing to utter even a single word, and trembling hands, I managed my way up to the podium. My vision was blinded by an array of portfolios, ready to question every single syllable vocalized. As I looked up from my written transcript, I saw my teacher staring at me compelling to read what I prepared.

Through the misty vision of tears, I read my speech out. The moment I finished my speech, I felt a sense of relief. But little did I know the worst was yet to come.

My teacher approached me just after my first Model United Nations competition was over, needless to say, I had not met her expectations. She criticised me in front of everybody and stated that she regretted picking me on the team, which left me devasted. Being the youngest on the team and to receive the harshest comments was too much for me to handle. As I entered my safety zone, my home, tears rolled down my face. Comforted by the words of my parents, I decided to forget the event and move ahead.

Within a year, they announced the second MUN. I had decided not to participate in the competition. But public speaking being my passion my mind could not let go the participation. I thought, why would I leave the opportunity to explore something so unique just because of criticism? Instead why not take it as a challenge & prove myself right that I can do it. I decided to view the criticism positively and auditioned for my second MUN and got selected.

I had made up my mind, I would work on the feedback (criticism) & come out with flying colours. After thoroughly understanding the procedure, I started my research. Though I did initially face a few hurdles, I overcame them with great determination.

As the days to the final competition neared, my anxiety grew. As the competition progressed, I noticed the change in myself. I was more involved & engaged in the strenuous portfolio of Pakistan, putting aside all my fears. I was enjoying every moment and felt a sense of satisfaction. I realized the criticism had given me more vigour and enthusiasm to compete.

I still remember the time when they were about to announce the results, I was kind of confident that I would win something. After what seemed like a long wait, I was given an honourable mention. My heart was overwhelmed with joy, doing my best to hide tears that wouldn’t flow my attempts of restraint. However, I realised the fact that the feeling of being satisfied with one’s performance was of much greater value than winning.

This continues to be embedded in my mind as a stepping stone towards personal growth. I learnt not only to combat failures with courage but also to view any criticism given to me as another opportunity to amend myself. It taught me that this world can often be challenging and at times things don’t work in your favour. However, what you have jurisdiction over is even more powerful, which enables you to shape your life.

My MUN experience has inculcated a strong attitude to accept criticism, learn from the mistakes and come out more strongly rather than viewing it with negativity. It has taught me to be confident, never lose hope and always do the best you can, no matter what.